I am not so sure how many of us end up in this cycle of impulsiveness, behaving as if we are always out of control and time. So we act without fully considering the consequences of our deeds. We leave so much collateral damage that we become immune to it, hardened even defensive. Until that one time, the single regrettable incident that we feel the boomerang. That is that time our words or deeds mow down our target and its surrounding environment leaving nothing but dust and silence, .pain. The shame comes back at us. It is within these dark few minutes directly following that convict us.
James 3:5 ESV /So also the tongue is a small member, yet it boasts of great things. How great a forest is set ablaze by such a small fire!
Ephesians 4:29 ESV / Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.
We realize we can't unwind those minutes, the act has been done. No high fives, no jubilation, no exaltation. We are left feeling the chill we stirred into existence.
"Next time things will be better, I promise." How can you be sure? Because I will learn to wait just one minute. I will use that minute to breath, to examine, to check myself. One thing I have learned to be true. No one can dictate my reaction to any act or behavior. I cannot give that control over to anyone else. I must own my stuff and never cede or make excuses for how I choose to conduct myself.
2 Timothy 1:7 ESV / For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control.