Those are the exact words I heard her say to him. "I can't spend potential." He was trying his best to make a good impression. We were on the train commuting from Newark to NYC. I was what is commonly known as ease dropping. Could not help it. I am by nature a people watcher.
I remember him being well-groomed, handsome even. He noticed her when she first boarded the train. Couldn't blame him, she was a looker. She was wearing the best! Top brands, manicured nails, even carried a briefcase. It was the mid-1990's. People still carried briefcases back then. She had a long shiny black mane, shoulder length, so believable I convinced myself it could be her hair. She was beautiful. Beautiful so I thought on the outside.
He tried every angle to get her attention. All respectful. You could tell he had been raised right. I thought, "Wow his people did good. This guy is awesome.". His only liability is he was broke. Yep, just starting out. She grilled him. Where did you go to school, what do you do for a living, where do you live, what kind of car you drive?....." Dang she asked secret service level questions. Nothing like what do you like to do in your spare time? What makes you smile? Where do you go to be alone? Who do you admire most in the world? Nothing like that. I bet if asked he would of had some awesome answers. He just looked and sounded like he would have hit those questions out of the park.
Finally as it was even Ray Charles clear that he was getting absolutely nowhere with her, I heard him say, "Look I just want to get to know you. I have a lot of potential." She responded, "Well I can't spend your potential."
And that is where she left it. He looked absolutely deflated.
I thought to myself, you might not be able to "spend his potential" but if you were 1/2 the lady he was hoping you were (and you are not), you would be at least willing to invest in his potential. That's it. Take a moment and see what he is made of not what paid of. See the way he looks at you. Get close enough to smell his essence. Care enough to let him down easily if that is the way it is headed. This my dear naïve lady is your loss not his. He brought you his best and you met him with your truth. And on your best day your truth is not good enough for his potential, now or later. He ought to thank you for saving him the time realizing how fake you are and I am not talking about the hair or that empty briefcase. No worries. Stay on the train you are on and see where that takes you. Instead of spending his potential you should spend time working on improving your own potential.
Potential is defined as the possibility of becoming something. Does not mean something great or excellent. It means becoming what you are capable. It means achieving your unrealized ability. I am on the side of potential every single time!
I remember him being well-groomed, handsome even. He noticed her when she first boarded the train. Couldn't blame him, she was a looker. She was wearing the best! Top brands, manicured nails, even carried a briefcase. It was the mid-1990's. People still carried briefcases back then. She had a long shiny black mane, shoulder length, so believable I convinced myself it could be her hair. She was beautiful. Beautiful so I thought on the outside.
He tried every angle to get her attention. All respectful. You could tell he had been raised right. I thought, "Wow his people did good. This guy is awesome.". His only liability is he was broke. Yep, just starting out. She grilled him. Where did you go to school, what do you do for a living, where do you live, what kind of car you drive?....." Dang she asked secret service level questions. Nothing like what do you like to do in your spare time? What makes you smile? Where do you go to be alone? Who do you admire most in the world? Nothing like that. I bet if asked he would of had some awesome answers. He just looked and sounded like he would have hit those questions out of the park.
Finally as it was even Ray Charles clear that he was getting absolutely nowhere with her, I heard him say, "Look I just want to get to know you. I have a lot of potential." She responded, "Well I can't spend your potential."
And that is where she left it. He looked absolutely deflated.
I thought to myself, you might not be able to "spend his potential" but if you were 1/2 the lady he was hoping you were (and you are not), you would be at least willing to invest in his potential. That's it. Take a moment and see what he is made of not what paid of. See the way he looks at you. Get close enough to smell his essence. Care enough to let him down easily if that is the way it is headed. This my dear naïve lady is your loss not his. He brought you his best and you met him with your truth. And on your best day your truth is not good enough for his potential, now or later. He ought to thank you for saving him the time realizing how fake you are and I am not talking about the hair or that empty briefcase. No worries. Stay on the train you are on and see where that takes you. Instead of spending his potential you should spend time working on improving your own potential.
Potential is defined as the possibility of becoming something. Does not mean something great or excellent. It means becoming what you are capable. It means achieving your unrealized ability. I am on the side of potential every single time!
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