It had been going on for some time. "It" everyone knew about but out of deference or as not to embarrass her hush became the operative word. When they were all together there seemed to be an implicit silence toward not digging into any specifics. The most anyone would muster is, "How are you Sarah?" They did not expect an answer, at least not an honest one. Sarah had long last mastered the art of deception any who and everyone around her played into it. It was easier that way, less awkward any how. Until one day out of the complete blue skies and just in the middle of an engaging game of Cribbage, Sarah asks aloud... almost as if she is talking to the air, "How could I ever live without him?"
And with that the door flew open and I walked through it. First of all, maybe you would go back to a time that you loved yourself, really loved yourself. You would remember what it feels like to wake up and anticipate a new day not hesitate what awaits around the corner. You would get to smile more and not the painted on smile that looks cracked around its edges. Maybe you would breath with lighter breaths, slow, relaxed, grateful, joyous breaths that you are entitled to have.
Maybe you would dream in color again. Go back to school. Learn a second language. Travel to visit your family. Cut your hair the way you like it! Buy something new just because. Take a cooking class. Not rush home because you receive a text.
Perhaps you would join a gym. Laugh at yourself out loud. Run through a sprinkler system. Wear a pair of torn jeans. Spend more time with your friends. Take off your sunglasses indoors. Stop having trip and fall "accidents" all the time.
Maybe you would find your voice again. Pat yourself on the back. Sing out loud. Occasionally make mistakes and get over it without beating yourself up about it. Leave dirty dishes in the sink for a day. Let the laundry wait. Take a walk by yourself.
Love yourself. Be yourself. Meet yourself again. That's a start. But you didn't ask me. Seemed like you were talking into the air. Sarah your deal, I just dealt.
And with that the door flew open and I walked through it. First of all, maybe you would go back to a time that you loved yourself, really loved yourself. You would remember what it feels like to wake up and anticipate a new day not hesitate what awaits around the corner. You would get to smile more and not the painted on smile that looks cracked around its edges. Maybe you would breath with lighter breaths, slow, relaxed, grateful, joyous breaths that you are entitled to have.
Maybe you would dream in color again. Go back to school. Learn a second language. Travel to visit your family. Cut your hair the way you like it! Buy something new just because. Take a cooking class. Not rush home because you receive a text.
Perhaps you would join a gym. Laugh at yourself out loud. Run through a sprinkler system. Wear a pair of torn jeans. Spend more time with your friends. Take off your sunglasses indoors. Stop having trip and fall "accidents" all the time.
Maybe you would find your voice again. Pat yourself on the back. Sing out loud. Occasionally make mistakes and get over it without beating yourself up about it. Leave dirty dishes in the sink for a day. Let the laundry wait. Take a walk by yourself.
Love yourself. Be yourself. Meet yourself again. That's a start. But you didn't ask me. Seemed like you were talking into the air. Sarah your deal, I just dealt.
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