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Choosing to love with purpose

10/15/2014

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If you live long enough and have gotten around well enough then one thing is indisputable. You know a little bit about the opposite sex. If you are a woman you know just enough to be dangerous. If you are a man then you know just enough to know, never fool with a dangerously-minded woman.

Relationships are like gum my mom told me. They may lose their taste but you gotta keep on chewin' especially if you stepped out there and married him.

Love is a choice. But to love with purpose is perhaps the most difficult energy force we will exercise. By purpose I mean to love with a meaningful outcome.

I love chocolate. I love puppies, I love baby feet. I love green tea. I love my children. None of these loves is difficult. I love each despite any backlash that may come along with them. Weight gain, accidents on the carpet, back talk, caffeine jitters. Baby feet that grow into stinky teenage feet. Still my love is unfettered. Can't get enough of this type of love.

Another deeper sort of love is the love women have for their husband. This type of love also includes an element of despite. Despite our tendency to be prescriptive in what love should look like, should feel like, should act like, we choose to love this individual with purpose. Despite our desire to control every love outcome we often come up short. Despite our temptation to try to change his love. Get it to mirror our love. Despite our fight to level the love playing field. Despite not always knowing if his love is going to spill over the love 1/2 empty glass. We choose to love him with purpose.

Our purpose in love is to honor our Godly role in the relationship. It is to esteem our husband as the head of the household and king of our castle. Our purpose is to make sure the children see him as  fearless, strong, loving, and brilliant. Our purpose is to take our place as queen alongside our king... protective, nurturing, available, alluring. And despite those times we feel none of these our purpose is to show love to him with these purposes etched in our heart. We do this despite but never in spite, because most of all we are in love.
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    La Detra Joy

    I love being around people. I would rather live falling than break my spirit never trying anything hard. This blog is about trying and retrying life.

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